“Two things scare me. The first is getting hurt. But that’s not nearly as scary as the second, which is losing.” -Lance Armstrong
“Sometimes it’s not that there is no one who loves you, but it is you who doesn’t want to be loved.” –Manish Kumar
Many people especially teenagers can relate to this problem, that they are afraid of being loved or to love someone. Maybe it’s because of their heart-breaking past, or maybe it’s the overthinking about their future. But they feel it difficult or get afraid to love.
Well, however, it may be better in some concern or in some special scenario. But in general, it almost ruins their happiness, communication skills, their behavior and so on. This is because people who often face this problem are so likely to want to live alone and they get used to it.
It’s not a bad thing to live alone, but think about it, how will you going to interact with others if you always live alone.
So, in this post, I will talk about 5 of those major reasons which are forcing you to stay away from love and I will also give some tips to overcome this situation.
Let’s get started:
1. Fear of Heartbreak.
The most common reason that is forcing you to hate love is fear of heartbreak. I know you have seen the worst past and have faced many things. Some may have broken your heart and have left you. But you should ask yourself this one simple question, “are all people the same?”
I mean if you think all are same, then keep it in mind, you too get included in the “all” people.
There are some people who are kind, there are some who are the worst. All you’ve to do is to see the difference between these two. And how can you do it?
“See their actions, not their words.”
Well, anyone can say nice things, but you should see their actions instead of their words.
2. Fear of breaking Trust.
This short 5 letter word is a feeling in itself.
Another most common reason why most people are afraid to love I see in today’s world is, they are afraid that someone will break their trust. Maybe someone has done it in their past that they are afraid of it now, or maybe they are just afraid of getting hurt.
Whatever the reason is, it forces them to stay in fear of love.
Well, so how can one overcome it?
I will not say that you should trust every single person completely and blindly.
After all, I will never say that you should trust someone blindly. But instead, you should trust those who are trustworthy.
And how can you find such people?
As I have told you in the above point, you should notice their action, not their words. If they are making efforts for you, they might be trustworthy.
One more thing, he/she is not your ex or the one who has broken your trust. All are not the same and you should keep it in mind.
Seriously, I have tired of saying it all the time. This is not just a common reason why people are afraid to love, but this is the reason for our countless problems in life.
Overthinking is the art of creating problems that don’t even exist there.
Nowadays, most people think too much about their future happenings. They try to predict their future and in this process, they end up thinking about those things which will never come into their lives.
Firstly, they start thinking about some small negative things, and then after a time, they end up in a whole different world and create problems that don’t even exist in the real world.
So, how can one stop overthinking?
Here is an article that I have written before How to Stop Overthinking This will surely help you to overcome this situation.
4. Fear of losing someone.
Another reason why most people are afraid of love is they are afraid of losing someone. Well, being abandoned is a common fear among most people. It’s natural that within the excitement of falling in love, you also think about the other side of your relationship, that is losing.
And for many people, this fear is so great that instead of falling in love, they chose to leave and refuse the love.
Well, in my opinions, this isn’t a big problem. I mean if you really think about it, this is kinda natural. I mean we all have a fear of losing things or someone we love. But tell me one thing.
You’re afraid of losing your phone or of breaking it down. But this isn’t mean that you should not even buy a phone.
Think about it and I think this simple thing will surely help you to overcome this reason.
5. Fear of repeating the past.
Most people are afraid to love is because they fear that their past may get repeated. I mean they might have seen something bad in their past and that’s why they don’t wanna repeat it again. And this fear of repeating past is so strong that they don’t wanna love someone or even don’t want to be loved by anyone.
Well, I can understand why you don’t want to repeat that again, but the thing is who said you that the past will repeat? I mean you can’t predict your future unless you’re making it by yourself. And I think you’re not making it in the same way you did before.
You have not trusted the same guy/girl whom you have trusted in the past. So, how you can say that things will repeat exact same. I mean if things go exact same, then it’s probably your fault, not the one whom you’ve trusted or had faith in.
Think about it.
Give these tips a shot and let me know in the comment section below how these work for you. And please do share it with your friends or family whom you think should need to read this.