Don’t take me wrong, being kind is one of the best things you can do if you do it without the aim/sake of any profit. We should be kind for no reason.
But in this post, I want to talk about something different.
I want you to believe in that being a little bit selfish is beneficial for us. And in this post, I will talk about it.
So, before you start judging me, just wait and read this post. I am sure I will make my point clear to you and you too will start thinking in the way I think.
So, let’s dive into it.
Have you ever been into a situation when someone asks you for a favor and you really don’t wanna do that work, but you’re so kind that you can’t deny their request and just agreed to do whatever they say?
Well didn’t know about you, but I personally have faced this situation in my past many times. I had a lot of my stuff to do, but the thing was I didn’t know how to say ‘NO’ to them. I thought they might get offended or will start to hate me if I didn’t do their job. So, what I do?
Yes! I simply just agreed to them and do whatever they ask.
I always think later that why I didn’t say NO to them, and I thought that I am so kind and maybe this was the reason. But let me tell you one thing.
This isn’t called being kind. This is called being fooled.
I just want to tell one thing. I am not going to teach you about social morals or your social responsibilities. I am here to tell you about the harsh truth of society and how you can live in this cruel world.
Here people are not as kind as you. They’ll use you and when their work gets done, they’ll eventually forget you. Believe me, I have faced this many time.
But again, it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t help anyone or don’t be kind. I want you to be kind, but at the same time, I want you to know your value and your priorities.
You should set priorities in your life and should follow them strictly.
There’s nothing more important than yourself and you should be aware of it. Don’t let other downgrade your value and never let them control you.
Here’s an article that you should read How to Stop Saying YES When You Want to Say NO
Now again don’t get me wrong and be literally selfish. I mean selfish in a way that you’re able to say NO and being able to choose yourself first.
I have seen this many time and don’t wanna lie to you, I have faced this too that I just can’t say NO to someone.
For someone, saying no is not a big deal. But if you’re like me, then you can understand this feeling. Want to say NO, but our brain somehow managed us to say YES and we end up saying YES and then regret about it later.
Didn’t know anyone else faces this situation too or it’s just me! (After all, I think I am a little bit weird.)
So, now comes the question that how I can be this selfish that no one gets hurts by my actions/words and I still somehow manage to choose myself first.
Here are some things which I have done and still do, and which you can do too:
Instead of just saying them NO harshly or you can say rudely. You can simply speak gently, softly and calmly to them.
You can explain to them why you can’t help them with their work but be kind in this process. You didn’t want to hurt them.
Tell them that you have your own personal issues/work to complete and that’s why you can’t help them now.
Here’s an article that you should read: How to Stop Saying YES When You Want to Say NO
Say you’ll help them later, but you should really mean it. I have seen many people saying that they’ll help others later, but don’t do anything.
Don’t be like them and if you say it, then you should really mean it.
You should set priorities in your life and believe me your own self should be on the top of your list. Chose you and your goals over everything, that’s how you can succeed and can become happy here.
Don’t let others distract you from your way to success. There’ll be many distractions in your way, all you have to do is to follow your goals and don’t choose anyone or anything over your goals.
Here’s an article that you should read: 7 Easy Ways to Stay Away from Distractions
By saying being selfish I don’t literally mean that go and be selfish. Ignore every other person and just do your own work. NO!
By being selfish I mean to know about your priorities and when you should say NO to others. Most times you can only be happy by choosing yourself over anything else and that is what you have to understand.
“If you really want to be happy, you need to be a little bit selfish.” –Manish Kumar
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